Princess Prego

It seems that every beautiful river, lake, stream, and pond in Alabama was created through the tears of a Native American princess. When I was a child, I absolutely loved going to Noccolula Falls in Gadsden, and not just because they had a kid-sized hamster wheel on the playground.

A huge stone sculpture of Princess Nocculula stands, poised to jump, over the huge rushing falls. She’s been told she can’t marry the man she loves, so she’s about to make one heck of a point.

Then there’s Camp Cottaquilla, my second childhood home. The story about the lake on that property changes pretty often, but the one I love involves Princess Cottaquilla, who was also told she couldn’t marry the man of her dreams. So she cried until Lake Cottaquilla was big enough to hold a bunch of Girl Scouts in swimsuits.

But my NEW favorite story about the power of tears does not involve a beautiful Native American princess. It’s just about a pregnant, emotional, peachy-colored girl who made it rain in Alabama for 3 days straight.

I apologize for the minor flooding and downpours the past few days, guys. I simply couldn’t stop crying long enough to make it stop.

It wasn’t really my fault.

First, my husband woke up grumpy. Then I stubbed my toe, made the worst cornbread anyone has ever tasted in their entire lives (seriously, HOW do you mess up cornbread), and ate enough chocolate chip cookies to feel seriously guilty.

But then the kicker came. I had to take my cat to the vet to get neutered.

Now I’ve had something like 85 million and two pets in my lifetime. From legless frogs named Lieutenant Dan to dogs name Shinbone, I’ve rescued just about everything you can imagine, and I have the veterinarian bills to prove it.

But I, along with all my experiences, am no match for the wrath of pregnancy hormones. Which must explain why I basically threw myself into the fur of my sweet little Emeril (named after my third favorite man in the world, Emeril Lagasse) and sobbed until he had been thoroughly bathed.

But Princess Prego didn’t stop there. I came home from dropping Em off at the vet and turned on Steel Magnolias. And that funeral scene was all it took to finish me off.

So with puffy eyes and a traumatized husband, I promise I will try to keep the waterworks to a minimum for the next few days.

Just keep me away from the Hallmark channel.